WHAT ARE YOU CURIOUS ABOUT?

I posed the question about what people were curious about and the following six people responded with these rather interesting questions and musings.  I commend them to you in the interest of your own curiosity.  What piques your curiosity?

CS

Why do I (and many others as we get older) wake up at 3 am?
Will we ever find other intelligent life in the universe?
What makes some people so darned funny and charismatic? (I have one of THOSE children)

SR

1. why people don't get that they are responsible for their own health

2. why people (including me) make the same mistakes over and over again

3. why certain cultures don't respect other humans

4. why you don't turn the heat up full when you boil water

5. what compelled the soldiers of WWII to be so patriotic and single minded

6. why Apple trashed mobile me.

BO

What would it take for public schools to see that identifying and teaching dyslexic kids reading in grades 2-5 would save millions in prison and other "failure costs".
Would a strong community service program in elementary grades decrease bullying and violence in middle and high school?

TW

I have often wondered how much your individual CULTURAL (or maybe social) background influences your interests or curiosities....growing up in a small town vs growing up in a large city...growing up in a very religious family vs a non-religious family...growing up in a home-schooled family vs attending public schools vs attending a private school...etc.

AW

Are humans capable of living peacefully?  Does God exist, or is it a human construct?  Will humans become cooperative enough to survive on this planet in a sustainable way?  Is there meaning in Literature or do the postmodernists have it right?  

DP

How do we cultivate it in our children and in ourselves? I am curious about the true meaning of citizenship in the 21^st century (sans hype or yellow press) and the enormous challenge of developing resilient and responsive human beings. I am curious about stewardship and leadership and the partnership of public and private education. I wonder about connecting travel, study abroad and cross-cultural activity (including second language learning) in a spiral curriculum that seeks to impart global mindedness to young adults.

What would we call it?

PAYING ATTENTION TO THE INSIDE

With gratitude to Peter Senge, who talks often about decentralizing the role of leadership in order to enhance the capacity of all people to work toward healthier human systems, I offer these observations, insights and experiences.

As leaders, we are acutely aware of trying to meet the needs of multiple constituencies – directors, associates, colleagues, employees, customers, and others in the larger community.   We have to learn how to receive, with a measure of appropriate grace and humility, invitations, requests, suggestions, recommendations, ideas, information, bad news, and demands.  The challenge is to attend to the smallest of details while remaining connected to a larger vision, mission and purpose and representing the organization as the main spokesperson, cheerleader, sage and guide.  And, we must not let any of the roles we perform go to our head and allow us to think that we know all the answers.  In fact, it’s very good if we can ask the right questions and help people clarify their own intentions and goals and be sure that we know our own.

I remarked and wrote recently that I found no particular virtue in being busy and that I often marvel at how people seem to measure their effectiveness by how full their calendars are.  What is essential for a leader, according to Senge is “to learn how to manage the precious resource of paying attention.”  I believe that what he means by that is that before venturing out and engaging all those other people, places and events, the leader needs to venture inside, and listen, to pay attention and be still.   It is here where we will find the resources and possibilities that will enable and empower us to reach out and connect with those others.

When we pay careful attention to our selves, to others, to the legitimate and genuine needs around us, we are in a much better condition and position to challenge and resist the status quo, to take creative and intelligent risks, and to encourage and support others.

This means we must carve out the time and place for that reflection, contemplation and renewal, be it solo or with a group of like-minded folks with similar needs and priorities.

When we trust our own personal core beliefs and values, our intuition and senses, and our inner teacher, we can learn how to deepen our connections to what matters most.

We are confronted and confounded by many choices every day, not only for this day or that but for the weeks and months ahead.  Do we pay attention and give time and energy to every hangnail that comes in the door or across our desk?  Do we allow our days, or our lives, to become fragmented by everyone else’s concerns, or can we find a way to be in touch with a larger purpose, still attend to the details, and communicate a larger concern?  Helping others frame their work and give them a larger context could be a great service, not only to them but to those others whom they serve as well.

Living close to the land in northern New Mexico, I continue to learn a lot about the uniqueness of creation.  Every animal, stream, forest, and tree is unique.  No two animals or trees or branches or streams are the same.  As human beings, we are expressions of that same creation and just as those expressions are essential parts of the eco-system, we can show our uniqueness too.  We would not ever think of a tree or a bush as being lost, or  confused, so why should we be any different?  We may forget from time to time or we may even get lost on occasion but if we remember who we are and what we are about, and from whence we have come, we can find our way back.  We can let go of the “delusion of separateness” so that we can learn to express ourselves in a way that is more connected to our nature.  We must let our own creation find us and in so doing live and work more completely, more congruently.

I can assure you that if we participate in this exercise, besides knowing of our vulnerability and imperfection, we will come to our rightful place in the world and be very much at home with ourselves. For many of us it has been a continual journey of inner exploration and discovery in order to be somewhat useful for outer exploration and discovery.  None of us can know the end from what was begun, thus we have to trust the evolving and unfolding while perhaps nurturing it along the way.  We can only contribute to the extent that we have developed the inner resources to do so.  Therefore it makes such great good sense to find the place, take the time and pay attention to the development of the inner world of being.

It is here that we will know not only what we can do, but more importantly, who we are.

When we discover our authentic selves, we can express the uniqueness that is ours and ours alone, and we will then be able to fulfill the imperative from the Oracle of Delphi of Know Thyself.   Equipped with such knowledge we are then prepared to know others in the context of meaningful, productive relationships.  And that is what makes all the

LIFE IS FRAGILE AND UNPREDICTABLE

Joe Nathan writes a regular column and I respond from time to time.  I've known Joe for almost 20 years.  He started the first charter school in the United States in Minnesota in 1992 and is now the Director of the Center for School Change at Macalaster College.  He and I are often on the same wavelength and here's a recent exchange with part of Joe's column to begin.

" Somewhere between Marina Keegan, friends and Bret Stephens, there’s something worth saying to graduates.  While I’m not yet sure what I’ll tell the Higher Ground Academy graduates and their families this weekend, here’s what I’m thinking.

Part of this is influenced by Marina Keegan.  Last month this 22-year- old graduated from Yale.  A fine writer, campus activist, and person in love, she already had a great job lined up at the New Yorker magazine.

In a recent column for the Yale News, she wrote, “I’m scared of losing this web we’re in. This elusive, indefinable, opposite of loneliness…But let us get one thing straight: the best years of our lives are not behind us….We’re so young. We’re so young. We’re 22 years old. We have so much time.”

She concluded, “We’re in this together, 2012. Let’s make something happen to this world.”

Keegan was right about a lot.  But she did not have “so much time.”  Five days after graduating, she died in a car crash.   She was wearing a seat belt.

As I read her words, I wept.  I cried for her, her family, and for the good that she probably would have done.  Perhaps in death, she will help others."

Her final essay is here:
http://www.yaledailynews.com/news/2012/may/27/keegan-opposite-loneliness/

Joe,
Good thoughts, all, and I share your grief at losing someone like Marina Keegan and so many others who, it would seem to us and our limited judgment, leave us prematurely before they were able to share more of who they were.  That’s why I don’t hold out much for “the best is yet to come” and I’ll tell you why.  All that we know that we have for sure is this moment, perhaps today and even the rest of today can be uncertain, for life is fragile, unpredictable and can be extinguished in a heartbeat, so to speak.  However, we don’t live on the edge of that.  We live with hope.

I interviewed hundreds of high school students across the country and most of them were living for tomorrow, or the future, and getting ready for what is next.  As I pursued those conversations, it seemed that so much of what they were thinking about and doing was future-oriented whether going to college, getting a job, starting a family, buying a house, making money, retiring early, etc, pursuing the American Dream.  When I said to them that it seemed to me they were going to spend most of their life getting ready to die they looked and sounded shocked.  Well, I said, seems like you’re always getting ready for whatever is next.

I asked how about living fully in the present?  Give all that you can today, this week, this month, this year, to this work that you’re doing now and live much more in the here and now, how about that?  Hmmm, new concept to many!  We all know kids like Marina - talented, gifted and who leave their mark in one way or another.  We’re grateful to them, to their families and their teachers for what they have contributed, for however long they’re with us.
Onward....
Gary

Keeping Up, Updates and Downloads

Have you noticed how often you get a notice that either a piece of software or an application needs to be "updated" and "downloaded" to be sure that you have the latest and greatest whatever?   It seems to me that it's almost a daily function like brushing your teeth or in some cases, taking a shower.  It cleans up the old and now you're all new and refreshed, or something like that.   However, here's my concern.

Why do things go out of date so quickly?  Is there the same kind of conspiracy of a new car model in order to boost sales?  Oh yes, there are improvements and sometimes, on rare occasions, increased speed and efficiency. I am not persuaded that faster is always better.  In fact, I now believe, and there's some evidence to support this, that slowing down is healthier and more productive, especially when it comes to mental tasks.  I have suspected built in obsolescence since the advent of Apple.  My old MacBook G-4 from 2006, worked just fine.  So why did I succumb to a new 13" Mac Book Pro Late 2011?  Was it the Intel HD Graphics 3000 384MB?  Honestly, that means nothing to me.  I'm just glad the damn thing works most of the time, doesn't get viruses, delivers what I need in terms of communication, files and storage and the rest I leave to the techhies. Yes, it's a great design and user-friendly.

I am tired of keeping up or trying to stay current with too many things, too many people, too many contacts.  It's simply too much so I am in the process of cutting back, cutting out and cutting down.  I may even delete LinkedIn completely and LinkOut.  I never did sign up for Facebook so that's a non-issue.  I am not a member of very many online groups except a few professional ones.
If I offend anyone in the process, I will send my apologies ahead of time.  I doubt it will be traumatic for any of them but I have concluded I want to spend what time I have remaining in some other activities other than software updates.  I find it's a little like too much traffic that makes me wait while there's a space for me to enter and continue.  I think I'll just avoid the traffic.  Thank you very much.

Violence in Video Games

Originally written 4 Feb 2008

Adults with many years of experience cannot expect children to be able to relate easily or quickly to an adult perspective.  Neither should they always try to persuade or convince the young to understand or accept their particular point of view.  However, that is what we do when we try to communicate personal, family and cultural values, transmitting our culture from one generation to the next. 

I expect young people of today to question and debate the issues that affect them and their generation..  And when there is disagreement, there can and should be a conversation with respect for each other’s views and positions. Then both will learn something of value.

Playing violent video games can increase a person's aggressive thoughts, feelings and behavior both in laboratory settings and in actual life, according to two studies that were in the American Psychological Association's (APA) Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. (April 2000) Furthermore, violent video games may be more harmful than violent television and movies because they are interactive, very engrossing and require the player to identify with the aggressor, say the researchers.

Violent Video Games and Hostile Expectations: A Test of the General Aggression Model.

    B. J. Bushman and C. A. Anderson (2002)  See also:  Short-term and Long-term Effects of Violent Media on Aggression in Children and Adults.  B. J. Bushman and L. R. Huesmann (2006) Archives of Pediatric & Adolescent Medicine 160, 348-352

     What is clear is that the research is divided and there are no easy or definite answers for any position – whether the games contribute to more aggression or that they only contribute to aggressive behavior in those who are already angry or that they contribute, but in a small and insignificant way or that they make it possible for aggression to occur but only under specific circumstances.  More reliable research is indicated.

     To understand some of the effects of video games, you need to go back to debriefings conducted by the U.S. Army after WWII. Interviewing soldiers returning from battle, researchers discovered a disturbing fact. A significant number of soldiers had been face to face with an enemy soldier, rifle in hand, enemy in their sights, gun not jammed, and had not fired. Something deep in their being, some sort of innate humanity, or values instilled early on, had prevented them from actually pulling the trigger.

     This was very disturbing to the military. They began a research effort to figure out what to do about this problem. They discovered that in the heat of battle, under the incredible physical and psychological stress of being faced with another human being you were supposed to kill, the higher mental functions were largely absent. Under such conditions, the mind reverts to much simpler modes of operation, to deeply wired, almost instinctive behaviors. In other words, no amount of target practice and classroom lectures about how you're supposed to kill the enemy had much effect when it counted.

     Over the following decades and wars, the Army learned that the way to get soldiers to reliably pull the trigger was to use very basic, repetitive operant conditioning, along the lines of standard behaviorist theory. Behaviorism provides a poor model for how humans act in everyday life, but it turns out to be a fairly good model for how humans act when they are under stress and have to act quickly, and are responding primarily to fear. Under stress, fearful people do what they have been conditioned to do.  That is one reason we have repetitive fire drills, so that we know how to react in an urgent situation.

     The Army's solution was to replace dry target practice with realistic training grounds, complete with pop-up targets, loud noises, smoke, stress, the works. The goal was to condition the soldiers: if it moves, shoot it now, don't think about it. Repetition, repetition, repetition: Target pops up, you shoot. Target pops up, you shoot. Do that often enough, and, research shows, next time you see something pop up, you are more likely to shoot it, even if it's a real human in a real battle. Sometimes it’s called “friendly fire” when it is a mistake.  This is not just a theory, it is documented by exit interviews from soldiers in later wars: The Army got what it wanted.

     What does this have to do with video games? The answer should be obvious. The whole point is, if it moves, shoot it. Again and again and again.  The military uses all kinds of expensive simulators, basically high powered video games, similar to what kids use every day, to train its recruits and to overcome the aversion to killing.   And there is evidence to suggest that those who are expert at gaming are some of the best and most effective fighter pilots and soldiers.  In the end, if you believe in war, maybe video gaming is a good thing for survival!  The downside is that, in most cases, the enemy is also trained in shoot to kill.  Is it that he who presses the right buttons faster wins?

     The cost for soldiers who survive, as witnessed by the increase in post-traumatic stress, is devastating.   As many as one-third of the homeless men in the U.S. are Viet Nam veterans, most of them suffering from PTSD and we are only beginning to count the cost from the years of human destruction in Iraq, Afghanistan and elsewhere.

     What can we learn from this?  Whether or not violent video games cause aggressive behavior may not be the real issue.  Perhaps the real question that needs to be explored is whether video gaming might contribute to an acceptance of the need to destroy the “enemy” without any need to feel anger or anything that can be consciously identified as aggressive behavior.   After all, it’s just a game.

Here is a sample:

“Hunched with his troops in a dusty, wind-swept courtyard, the squad leader signals the soldiers to line up against a wall. Clasping automatic weapons, they inch single-file toward a sandy road lined with swaying palm trees.

The squad leader orders a point man to peer around the corner, his quick glance revealing several foes lying in wait behind a smoldering car. A few hand signals, a quick flash of gunfire, and it's over.  The enemy is defeated, but no blood is spilled, no bullet casings spent: All the action is in an Xbox-based training simulator for the military, called Full Spectrum Warrior.”   (Associated Press 10/03)

 Finally, here is something which should also concern all of us.  When many people see a real video, shot live, they think that because it’s seen on a screen, that it’s not real when it is.  It’s just like a video game or worse, a television program with a script and actors and made up in a studio or on a set somewhere like a movie.  If you want to test that out on yourself, take a look at some of the current, live, very real, military videos and register your own cognitive and emotional response.  This is somewhat the flip side of the video gaming issue and equally important because it is very real and not a game.

     Not every child playing video games will develop aggressive behaviors and only a small percentage will become soldiers who are trained to do what soldiers have to do.  The point is that both children and adults can be easily influenced by the media and high powered, well- conceived video games.  What the short and long term results are will continue to be debated but there is compelling evidence to suggest we better take a hard look at what is happening as a result of violent video gaming.

The River

For the past seven years, we have lived on the Rio Chama.  It has its origins in south-central Colorado, just above New Mexico in the San Juan Mountains.  It flows south where it is impounded by three dams, creating three lakes, Heron, El Vado and Abiquiu.  The entire length of the river is 130 miles, 34 of which are below the Abiquiu dam and that's where we are about 10 miles east of the dam.  The flow today (May 20) is about 1190 cubic feet per second, or 8,900 U.S. gallons.  That's a lot of water.

We are privileged to live on a large bend in the river, on approximately 1000 feet of riverbank and I can watch the river flow silently and constantly on its way to join the Rio Grande near the San Juan pueblo, just north of Espanola, about 30 miles north of Santa Fe.  The Rio Chama is a major tributary of the Rio Grande.  The river is an illustration of consistency, life force, and calm.  The only negative I can think of is the demand from FEMA for flood insurance although the dam upstream is able to contain the water and should it break, we're all going downstream.

The river has been used by people for 10,000 years for a variety of purposes, perhaps one of the more important being irrigation in this high desert country known for its dryness and very low average yearly rainfall.  However, it is also used for recreational enjoyment of rafting, kayaking and fishing.  For me, it is a source of contentment, constancy and quietness and its scenic beauty is enhanced by a large variety of water birds including many ducks, geese, eagles and cormorants.  They use the river as a natural habitat and as a food source whether vegetation or fish.  I use the river as a source of natural beauty and a resource that enriches the quality of each day.  Sitting on the portal facing north, we embrace the river as it blesses us in its passing.

Unplugging for a Few Days

Connectivity Suspended – Out of Touch - Enjoy!

As the owner/user of an iPhone, an iMac and a MacBookPro, plus a wireless connection in office and home, and in most public venues for all of them, (plus a roommate who is similarly connected) I am somewhat familiar with email, voice mail, live conversations and meetings through various means including Skype.  The latter is particularly useful for international calls.  Add to this mélange of apparati the social media network that includes one or more of the following social media -Facebook, Twitter, Linked In, My Space and Google + -  and you have activity that sucks up a lot of time, attention, energy and resources.  Yes, it’s how people communicate, connect and do business and fills our calendars and schedules with meetings, appointments, commitments and projects.

When we travel we sign up for “hot spot” with our phone service and that allows us to stay connected while on the road.  We used to depend on a satellite connection via a dish on the top of our mobile office.  They might have called it “cool spot” or  “mobile muse” and now there is something called Pinterest which is a Virtual Pinboard. “It lets you organize and share all the beautiful things you find in your life. People use pinboards to plan their weddings, decorate their homes, and organize their favorite recipes.”   They post photos, projects and whatever they want to share on a board for others to see. Someone will surely mount a site that allows people to organize and share all the ugly things they find in their lives.  I prefer an application called “Gas Buddy” that allows me to find the least expensive fuel in whatever area I happen to be in at the moment.  I prefer real space to virtual any day of the week.

In light of all this connectivity, our most recent offering was an opportunity for a small group of people to unplug for several days and come together in an old-fashioned retreat setting and see what we might make of this kind of experience.   It will be interesting to get some feedback on the unplugged part of the Seminar and see how many were really able to stay simply unplugged for just three full days.  Perhaps the only way to accomplish that part is to go to a hermitage where there is no electricity, no wireless, no cell service (global sat excluded) no land lines and make it a true wilderness event.   I will put it on my to do list and write it out on a yellow note pad.  Stay tuned, or connected, to learn of what’s coming down the road!

Asking the Right Question

As an extension of my role as an adjunct professor teaching a course called “The Doctor Patient Relationship,” I was shadowing one of the third-year residents in family practice for 24 hours. We were summoned around midnight to the emergency room where a woman appeared with a lump on her forehead.  The young doctor took her vital signs, talked with her and expressed appropriate concern about what had happened.

The patient reported that she was on a step ladder, hanging a picture and the hammer
 had slipped from her hand and hit her on the left side of her forehead where there was indeed a red, swollen bump.  The doctor asked if she were in pain and whether she had any other symptoms and she responded by saying that the bump had hurt but she didn’t feel any other signs of discomfort or pain.  All the vital signs checked out OK and after the doctor examined the bump closely and talked to the patient a little more, we left the room to get some pain pills and write a prescription.

Doctor Leonard looked at me while we were outside and said, "I don’t know why she bothered to come here, it’s not serious and she could have just taken some aspirin or ibuprofen and saved herself the trip."  I responded by asking him if he wanted to know the real reason she had shown up and he said he thought it was because she was scared and that it might be more serious.  Not a bad guess, said I, but if you want to know more, when we go back in, ask her what she’s doing on a ladder at midnight on Friday, hanging a picture.

“So,” says Dr. Leonard to Nancy Frame, “what were you doing on a ladder at midnight hanging a picture?”   She looked at him, silent for a moment, and then with tears starting to flow and shaking a bit, said, “My husband just divorced me and this is the first weekend my 3 kids are with their Dad and I was all alone and feeling really bad.”    She went on a bit about how hard it’s been for the past several months and she wasn’t sure how she was going to get through all of the pain, hurt and loneliness.  Dr. Leonard let her express her sadness, her emotional pain, and then said he knew the name of a really good counselor if she wanted someone that she could talk to about how to cope with her struggle.  She said that would be really helpful and thus that first treatment session ended.

After Nancy left, Dr. Leonard turned to me and said, “How did you know?”  I said I didn’t know anything but sometimes, asking the right question will get you more information than if you assume you know that what you’re seeing and hearing is all there is to know.  Take time to ask another question before concluding with your first response.  See how that might change what you might have said earlier.

Appreciating Silence and Stillness

Taking some time to be still, sit quietly and listen to the deafening silence is such a nurturing experience to mind, body and spirit.  No rings, dings, beeps, not even the sound of traffic or voices or the wind.
All is quiet and at rest.  Even 15 minutes can make a positive difference in the rest of the day.  Imagine taking that gift and extending and expanding it to half an hour or a complete hour.  Empty the mind and focus only on one thought or feeling and stay with it.  The view from my office window provides a horizon of treetops and blue sky, a sun-drenched morning.  I see Spring, feel it in my bones and let the warmth sink in as I move closer to walking lightly on the good earth very soon.  The ground is still damp from a day of rain and snow and green growth is evident in bud and branch.  How shall I connect with all of this and breathe in new life and growth for myself?  Stay connected, stay grounded and know that the ground of our being is creation herself.  Plant and cultivate.  Feed and water these lives whether in plant or animal or one's self.  Hold all close with careful attention to what you can give to these moments for the return is well worth the investment in this time of silence.

The Challenge of Transition

I participated recently in a small group exercise in which we shared our challenges that we are facing currently.   I described how I was part of an organization that was expanding and growing and my personal intent was to decrease my activity to the point of a half-time commitment.  It's a small organization and I have been a significant part of it since its founding 14 years ago so that everyone's participation and commitment are critical to its success.

The feedback from the others in the group was enormously helpful as I continue to wrestle with the transition from full-time to part-time professional work.   One person said, "How long might you be comfortable living with the tension?  For example, in your experience, do these things tend to resolve themselves with a little patience?  And/or is there a willingness for the idea you have for your life to change if something unexpected is being called forth that you didn't anticipate?"  While I might have responded no, these things do not tend to resolve themselves what I focused on instead was my lack of patience, thus the lesson learned was take a breath, step back and realize it doesn't all have to be accomplished within the next two months.  Plans are just that and sometimes they might need an adjustment here and there.

Another person said "Fill your other hours (over the 20 you're willing to work) with those things you are excited to be able to now pursue and try to truly be just a consultant - distancing is an opportunity to appreciate."   Other responses included answer your own question objectively as if you were one of us and make a pro-con list of benefits and burdens of being either full time or part time.  I did not expect anyone to have the magic recipe or answer that would solve the transition equation but their responses were thoughtful and very helpful to me personally and professionally.  The exercise also demonstrated the tremendous value of feedback from others as a learning experience and what I learned has helped me take several more steps toward the desired goal.